Can we please return to civility?

It is my word, civility. Merriam-Webster defines it as courtesy, politeness, a polite act or expression, and training in the humanities. Civility for me means exercising humanity with mindfulness towards others and our sphere. It is such a beautiful word, and I miss it. Not the word, but civility among us. I've been thinking about it quite often, even before former President Trump won the election and his return to the White House became inevitable. It was heartbreaking to watch such a hateful man win this nation's presidential election. 

Photo by Logan DeBorde on Unsplash

I am not concerned about his plan to deport unlawful residents of this nation. I am concerned that I will be targeted in a massive sweep as a Korean so I will be carrying my United States Passport Card, a federal government issued identification, as proof of my U.S. citizenship. Is it inconvenient? Not at all. It is the size of my California Identification card. 

Unlawful residents. I rarely use undocumented or illegal to describe immigrants who unlawfully enter and reside in this nation. I cringe when the mainstream media generalizes immigrants as though we are here all under one circumstance, unlawfully. About 75% of immigrants in the United States lawfully enter and reside with permission from the government. So you see, most immigrants aren't afraid of Mr. Trump's plan to deport unlawful immigrants. 

I know not a single person who is here unlawfully. I'm not losing sleep over it. I'm certainly not anxious about it. Mr. Trump's plan for deporting unlawful residents is simply following the law, which already exists. Deportation is the legal consequence of unlawful entry and residence. If this law is unjust and discriminatory, why haven't the progressives worked to change the law? If we believe in open borders, then why haven't we worked to abolish all immigration restrictions and laws?

The words from The New Colossus by Emma Lazarus in 1883 are altruistic: Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free. It is something we should do, but is it something that we can do? I don't think anyone who lives in Los Angeles with a mindful heart would say yes. Parts of the county have become homeless encampments that scream inhumane living conditions and greater public health hazards. More than 75,000 in the county are homeless with the majority sans access to running water and toilets. Some dig through trash cans for food. Doesn't it sound foolish for the county to be a sanctuary to unlawful immigrants when it can't even provide humane living conditions for the 75,000 already living in the county? 

At best, it is foolish. At worst, they don't care about inhumane living conditions and greater public health hazards as long as their words are altruistic while keeping their distance. Regardless of at best or worst, how can we say that we have civility when we have folks living in abhorrent conditions? We can't. We must return to civility before we can be altruistic in our actions and not just with our words. 

Civility cannot exist without law and order. Californians overwhelmingly voted in favor of Proposition 36 to allow felony charges and increase sentences for certain drug and theft, under $950, crimes last month after years of being plagued with crimes that forced retailers to lock toothpaste, toothbrushes, shampoo, deodorants, razors, and shaving creams to name a few behind plastic doors. Simply put, we ran out of liberal patience while waiting for someone to unlock the doors for toothpaste.

The proposition reclassifies certain misdemeanor theft and drug crimes as felonies to ensure mandated treatment for drug possessions and prison time for theft. After a decade of Proposition 47, which changed certain low-level crimes from potential felonies to misdemeanors back in 2014, Californians learned that lax laws and penalties breath unruly behaviors that hurt and damage. We learned that we cannot maintain law and order without meaningful enforcement.

Not all of us have humanity and ethics. Some of us don't even have basic etiquette. Enforcement of law and order isn't to change a person who lacks humanity, civility, and ethics. It exists to restrain folks from hurting another person or damaging another's property by imposing penalties. What is that saying good therapists always say about boundaries? Boundaries without consequences are meaningless. Our laws are boundaries and penalties are consequences.

Can we achieve a culture of inclusion, equality, and empathy without civility? Come January 25, this nation will turn dark with executive orders that will shatter some of us. How did we get here?

We are all culpable. It isn't just MEGA. It is also the liberals. Our politics are polarized. Different opinions and perspectives are considered hostile rather than opportunities for discussion. We are intolerant, even to questions. Blinded by our extreme agendas to see that some issues are grey, we can't acknowledge that not everything is black and white. Civility lost in the thickness of polarization.